Years ago, when I found out that i was pregnant with my 4th child, I wanted to go into hiding. My oldest was 3, another 2 and the youngest was 3 months....I knew that the comments would fly!

4 years earlier i had answered the call to "trust The Lord for my children"...I had dutifully thrown away the pills and gotten pregnant immediately.  But it seemed that as soon as a baby was born it would be only a matter of months and another was on his or her way.

When I was about 5 months along with Emmalie ( whose birthday is tomorrow) I had a day  of "chatting with The Lord" .  It was a day like no other as we talked back and forth.  I remember it as He reminded me that "I had not planned my children BUT HE had had them planned since before the beginning of time.  He knew their names and their number"

He then began to methodically ask me questions like.; " have your pregnancies been good". Have the babies been healthy?  Had we ever gone without a need being met?"  Over and over I had to agree with His faithfulness.   Then He said.."I have tried to bless you but you have let others steal the blessing away by listening and being concerned about what they think or will say"

That stopped me in my tracks!  I had been blaming the "talkers" for my stress and embarrassment when here I was being told that it WAS ME!!  I was letting them own space in my life..steal my blessing!  I had no one to blame but myself!

I remember kneeling on that ratty old kitchen floor and asking for forgiveness.  Immediately I was free!  The burden lifted, my nerves went back under my skin, my antennae disappeared  and my emotions came back in line with the Throne!
I wish I could say I never struggled again but that would not be true!  But I can say I never struggled the same again .  I would quickly run to The Lord as soon as I would catch myself thinking outside of His truths.  His Promises are yes and amen and He never fails!!

Trust Him ~. Won't you?

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